When Your Homeschooled Child Doesn’t Want to Do Schoolwork: A Gentle Reminder of Why You Started
Homeschooling is a beautiful, brave choice but let’s be honest, it isn’t always easy.
Every homeschooling parent eventually faces that moment: your child is staring at the math book like it’s a personal enemy, fiddling with pencils instead of writing, or insisting they’re just not in the mood today. You start to wonder if you’re doing something wrong, or worse if homeschooling was the right decision at all.
But here’s the truth: you are not alone, and this struggle doesn’t mean you’re failing. In fact, these moments often open the door to the true heart of homeschooling.
Remember Why You Chose Homeschooling
Before worksheets, schedules, or curriculum packages, there was a reason you decided to homeschool. For many parents, that reason includes:
- Flexibility and freedom from rigid school systems
- A desire for individualized education
- Creating a safe, supportive environment
- Building deeper family connection
- Allowing children to explore their interests
- Instilling faith, character, or cultural values
- Avoiding burnout, stress, or negative school experiences
Homeschooling was never supposed to look like a traditional classroom squeezed into your dining room. You didn’t choose homeschooling so your child could live under pressure you chose it so they could thrive.
The Real Challenge: It’s NOT “Schoolwork”/ But How Does My Child Learn ?
When a homeschooled child resists schoolwork, the issue often isn’t laziness or defiance. More often, it’s a mismatch between the teaching method and how the child naturally learns.
Some kids learn best by: “What are their Learning Styles?”
- Moving (kinesthetic learners)
- Seeing (visual learners)
- Hearing (auditory learners)
- Talking through ideas (verbal learners)
- Touching and experimenting (hands-on learners)
And some need a mix of all of the above.
The beauty of homeschooling is that you get to discover and honor these differences. If your child hates worksheets, maybe they need manipulatives. If they resist reading, maybe audiobooks or graphic novels make the story come alive. If writing is a battle, maybe dictation or typing lifts the pressure.
Homeschooling gives you the freedom to follow your child, not force them into a box.
(Check out my article here if you want a break down on these learning styles)
Education Is Not Limited to a Desk
One of the greatest gifts of homeschooling is that learning can happen everywhere.
Math shows up in:
- Baking cookies
- Budgeting at the grocery store
- Measuring wood for a DIY project
Science is alive in:
- A walk at the park
- A garden in your backyard
- A kitchen experiment gone wrong (and then right!)
Reading is found in:
- Road signs
- Recipes
- Instructions for a new game
History and geography live in:
- Family conversations
- Cultural festivals
- Maps you explore together
The world becomes the classroom, and suddenly learning feels natural, not forced.
Connection Over Control
Many families begin homeschooling for academic reasons but stay for emotional ones.
The most important part of homeschooling isn’t checking boxes; it’s nurturing the relationship between you and your child. When a child feels safe, supported, and understood, learning comes more easily.
So when your child doesn’t want to do their schoolwork, pause before pushing harder. Ask questions like:
- “What feels hard about this right now?”
- “Is there another way you’d like to try this?”
- “Do you need a break, movement, or a snack?”
Sometimes, honoring their needs is the exact thing that helps them try again.
Homeschooling Is a Journey, Not a Race
No two homeschool families look alike. No two children learn alike. And no single day defines your success.
Remember this:
Bad days are not a sign of failure, they are a sign that you’re human.
If your child is struggling to do schoolwork, it’s okay to slow down. Rethink. Adapt. Homeschooling isn’t about pushing; it’s about building a lifelong love of learning.
So give yourself grace. Give your child grace. And remember why you chose this path in the first place: not to replicate school, but to create something better.
Also, take this time as we wind down the end of the year and have a family discussion about what is working, what isn’t working and how you can redivine what homeschooling looks like for you, your child and family.
Happy Learning, Growing, Loving and Thriving !